Every major area of my life was falling apart except my career. The visit to Dr. Frank Njenga’s office was an impulsive and accidental move, yet it began the most incredible journey I’ve walked in the years I’ve lived.
Just like many men, I didn't think the issues I was facing were skin deep. “I’ll just walk in and get some sleeping pills,” I told myself while seeking help. Looking back, I wanted a prescription so I could legally buy sleeping pills, which were going to temporarily fix my problem without the burden of ever looking inward and seeking a permanent solution.
To cut a long story short, this visit unearthed many underlying issues that manifested in my life as sleep and social, emotional, behavioural, and financial challenges I’d faced in my life.
Six years since circumstances led me to work on my mental and emotional health, I’m here to report that every area of my life has recorded remarkable improvement. Challenges have not ended, but I’m equipped with the right skillsets to navigate them. I’m managing relationships much better.
My sleep has improved, and I’m more fulfilled, happy, and content than before. While this mental health journey began through what people might have termed a tragedy, it has produced the greatest dividends, which I and those around me will continue benefiting from until the day I exit this earth.
Before therapy
Prior to seeking professional help, my views around mental health were just as uninformed as those of many men. I used to loudly proclaim, "Therapy is for weak men," whenever a friend with a psychology degree nudged me to consider taking that path.
But now, I’ve become a proponent of seeking professional mental health services. Just like we go to the gym to grow our muscles, or go back to school to improve professional qualification, or eat healthy to watch our weight, that’s the same way we need to take care of our emotions.
The idea that men must always be tough and stoic is deeply flawed and unsustainable. As human beings, we all experience emotions—joy, anger, frustration, guilt, happiness—and these emotions shape how we react to life’s challenges, from divorce and illness to workplace struggles. Ignoring emotional health leaves us unprepared to cope when life’s pressures mount.
A Message to Men
Here’s what I tell men: only the wearer of the shoe knows where it pinches. Seeking help might feel like a blow to your pride, but the truth is, no one else truly understands the pain you’re carrying. People may cheer you on from the sidelines, but when tragedy strikes, those same voices often disappear.
Don’t live for the applause of others. Be your own man. Prioritize your well-being, not for the sake of appearances, but for yourself. When you’re healthy and whole, those around you will naturally benefit from the better version of you.
Remember, I’m rooting for you. No matter how insurmountable your challenges may seem, you have the strength and power within you to change your circumstances and steer your life in a better direction. Opening up doesn’t have to be hard. Say It in Black and White!!!
By Dannish Odongo, Founder, The Wellness Tribe