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He left gas running, lit a matchstick: GBV survivor

Police asked if they were the ones who told her to marry him

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by Magdalene Saya

News14 June 2023 - 02:00
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In Summary


  • • Cases of domestic violence are on the rise in Makueni, with police accused of inaction
  • • Survivors share their close shaves with death and frustrations in the hunt for justice
Catherine Ngui (in cream top) speaks about her experience in an abusive marriage and how she managed to come out alive

Catherine Ngui had seen the red flags of gender-based violence from her husband since 2013, but she took it as something normal.

Like most women, Ngui assumed all would be well and her husband would change with time.

However, the situation changed when in April last year, her husband came back home drunk, or so she thought.

She was at home with her child, who was then in Class 5.

The man locked the door with a padlock, apparently released the gas and threatened to light the matchbox.

Her efforts to plead with him to let their child out of the house fell on deaf ears as his determination was to set them on fire.

“I told him to let the child out and let the two of us burn, but he refused. He lit the box, threw the stick inside the house, left and shut the door from outside,” she says.

“Thank God the lit stick hit the table mat. I called the neighbour. An extra key I had given the neighbour saved us,” she adds.

Three days later, she entered the house and found her husband sleeping on the couch.

She, however, discovered a knife under the cushion but she could not tell the purpose it was for.

Two hours later, the man who she claims was disguising himself as being drunk ordered their child to go to church. But it was just a Friday.

As soon as he left, the man locked the door and confiscated all the spare keys and even her phone. As he went to the bedroom, she took the knife from the seat and placed it under the table.

I told him to let the child out and let the two of us burn, but he refused. He lit the box, threw the stick inside the house, left and shut the door from outside

POLICE INSENSITIVITY

He asked for the knife so she passed it to him to avoid a looming beating. She however did not ask what she had done.

“I was hit by something and fell down, I felt I should wake up and defend myself because I thought he was drunk but I realised he was just pretending. I knew any attempt to wake up would be met with more force,” she says.

"I pretended to have fainted to see what he would do. I saw him drop the weapon and pick the knife,” she adds.

To date, Ngui cannot remember what transpired after that. She woke up at midnight and found her husband in the bedroom, asleep.

In the morning, he handed her Sh2,500 meant for their house rent. His instruction was that she adds the Sh500 deficit since their rent was Sh3,000.

However, he called in the evening and demanded Sh500 from the same amount, claiming he would return it when he comes back to the house.

He however showed up the following day, allegedly landing on her with kicks and blows for not paying the rent. He also allegedly choked her till she fainted only to be awakened by screams from their son.

Despite having no energy left, she bit his hand and took her child and left the marriage. She says her efforts to get help from the police failed, as the same people she banked on for help would instead allegedly ridicule her.

“The police tell me those are family issues, they are not helping. To date the P3 I paid Sh2,000 for never helped me, yet I used money to fill it,” she alleges.

“The way they (police) would talk would hurt more than the domestic violence. When I was beaten, I went to the police and I was asked if they are the ones who told me to marry him.”

BRIBES FOR HELP

Jane Kalonzo had her 14-year-old niece assaulted in August 2021 allegedly by a person well known to the family.

Her niece, who was in Class 7 then, had her leg broken and needed Sh86,000 for a rodding procedure to stabilise the fractured bones.

The culprit’s father supposedly promised to sell land and give her the money for the surgery, but on the day she was supposed to collect the money, the man instead turned on her, hitting her with a jembe.

Despite shielding herself from the attack with her hand, she was badly hurt. Only the loud screams she made saved her from imminent death.

She cannot however hide the pain of the frustration she apparently encountered at the various police stations in her pursuit of justice.

“The police asked for what I had to follow up on my case. I ‘fulizad’ Sh300 and gave him everything. I was at Mukuyuni and was supposed to go back to Wote, so I left on foot,” she says.

Apart from the frustrations, the case failed to proceed for failure to produce witnesses. Those she had either refused to come out due to fear or were asking for money before they can testify.

The culprit was finally arrested after she had supposedly paid Sh2,000 for fuel.

“His fingerprints were taken but in the end, the case ended there. The fingerprints are at Mukuyuni up to date,” she says.

The medical bills were eventually paid by the Makueni government. However, her niece has remained out of school to date.

'SOCIAL VICES' 

Assistant county commissioner Martin Kagucia says cases of gender-based violence cases have increased, mostly for married couples, probably due to stress or related matters at home.

Most incidents at village level are captured by several actors and reported to the chiefs and subchiefs, either through the Nyumba Kumi initiative, village elders or community policing.

He said there may be some inaction but the security sector has been beefed up and gender desks are now available where victims can now easily report the cases.

“I may not refute the bribery claims but these are vices that are in the society,” he said.

“It could be true there are those who may be asking for bribes towards helping the victims, but no such cases has come to our attention.

“If someone is being asked to give out money for the P3 forms, they should report through the gender office or pick it up through the OCS.” 

He further admits that most criminal cases end up not having witnesses due to some certain connotations and beliefs that most witnesses will be jailed for coming out to testify.

Margret Muraguri, a prosecution counsel working with the Office of the Director or Public Prosecutions in Makueni, says between January and March, 39 defilements have been reported in the county.

“We have had four incest cases, one sexual assault, six attempted defilement, one gang defilement, two attempted rape cases, one unnatural offence involving humans and animals, and three sodomy offences,” she says.

Mobilisation Agency for Paralegal Communities in Africa (Mapaca) Trust executive director Joyce Mulu says GBV is a phenomenon that is not known to many in the community; wife beating is seen as a disciplinary action issue.

Mapaca Trust is a civil society organisation base in Wote town, Makueni.

Despite public awareness, some of the survivors remain reluctant to report due to what they term inaction presumably by the police.

“For now, we are following up 17 cases that happened to go to the police but are not picking from the police station to the next level,” she says.

She has called for a multi-sectorial approach in ending GBV according to the national commitments that aim to end GBV by 2026.

She raised concern that Makueni county has only one safe house, which is not up to the required standards.

Based on the magnitude of the problem at the community level, she recommends a safe house be established in each of the six subcounties.

This is because it involves dealing with sexual violence, yet many defilement cases are incest and the perpetrator is staying in the same environment with the victim.

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