Grief is a natural response to the loss of a loved one and is always a devastating experience. When someone close to you dies or separates with you, your world changes.
Grief can occur after a death, separation, divorce, illness or other significant loss for instance loss of job. It affects us emotionally, physically and has devasting effects to mental health of the affected.
Grief can happen to anyone. People who have gone through severe losses or other stressful events are more likely to develop depression.
This pain of loss can be very intense and come in waves over a long period. Life can feel like it no longer holds any meaning which can be very terrifying. Grief comes in disorienting waves and it can feel like nothing will ever be right again and helplessness crips in.
When grief is prolonged, it gets into depression and the consequences can have petrifying effects like suicide, poor health leading to non-communicable chronic illnesses such as diabetes and high blood pressure that consequently lead to other organ related poor health.
A grieving person may feel shocked, numb, angry and fearful. One may feel guilty for having contributed to the loss especially in instances of marital separation or divorce. These feelings are natural and normal. There are no guidelines about how one should feel.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve and we all react in our own way. Anyone giving pressure to a grieving person doesn’t really care. Anyone grieving should be allowed to be themselves.
Grieving often ends up in mental disorder. WHO asserts that more than 75% of people in low- and middle-income countries receive no treatment.
Barriers to effective care include a lack of investment in mental health care, lack of trained health-care providers and social stigma associated with mental disorders.
People struggling with grief often have emotional breakdown, often cry and can display the following symptoms:
● Trouble sleeping
● Lack appetite
● Mood swings
● Difficulties with concentration
● Difficult in making decisions
Coping With Grief and Loss
There are numerous ways to grieve and learn to accept loss. Grief should never be ignored. It’s imperative to note that support is always available so long as one manages grief initially on their own. Here below are some effective treatments for grief.
Family and genuine friends may provide the much compassion needed to those struggling with grief.
However, some family members and friends may compound the situation and mislead a grieving person to disastrous and more hurting results.
A lot of care must be taken in choosing with whom to share one’s frustrations with especially when it comes to loss through separation with loved ones.
Participating in favorite physical activities is a very good destruction, stress reliever and healthy way coping with grief. Physical activities are antidepressants and all-natural treatment for grief and loss.
Besides exercising has many health benefits including protection against heart disease, diabetes, enhancing sleep patterns, and lowering blood pressure. Separation anxiety can be managed through distracting one’s brain to avoid dwelling on negative thoughts.
The distraction could be through engaging in something one loves doing like reading a book, nature walk or any other activity. Psychological therapy is important in helping someone identify and change troubling emotions, thoughts, and behaviors.
Even the strongest of all needs a qualified therapist in helping them improve their mental health and wellbeing. Loss prompted by loss of a relationship especially separation and divorce can be treated through divorce/separation recovery support groups.
Most of these groups are often found in religious settings. It is imperative to note that grief is a natural response to loss. Evidence has proven that the pain of loss can feel devastating, but there are healthy ways to cope with grief and to heal.
Everyone is prone to grief and loss. Help is available for all those struggling with grief and loss.
Eliud Muriithi
Director, Commercial Services, KEMSA
