I am a people watcher. I love to sit in a restaurant that overlooks a street or in a mall and watch people. People say a lot just by going about their business. Once I was in a drinking establishment, (when we were still able to).
A couple in love caught my eye. The man kept whispering things to his lady. She giggled and blushed. It was beautiful to watch. They soon stood up to leave. He held her waist and carried her handbag. Sweet I thought. Newlyweds maybe.
They were back maybe 40 minutes later. The lady looked different. Wait. It was not the same lady. They sat at the same table. As the waiter walked towards them, I was sure the waiter would say something to expose him. I cannot read lips sadly, but from the body language, it looked like the waiter just took their order like he had never seen the man. As the waiter walked away, he smiled. The man meanwhile was squeezing his new/other lady’s arms.
Since Covid-19 I have taken my pass time online. I will check out what is trending and see what people have to say. I will go through people’s profiles, mostly to see if they look like what they say. Usually they have the most absurd handles and rarely have pictures of themselves. Goes to show that bullies are really cowards. Online and offline.
A young lady posts a picture of herself. She looks good. Confident. She is feeling herself. She has just turned a year older. One of those significant ages. Good for her you think, you would think most people would wish her well, at the very least.
One young man asks her to post if she still gets her menses. Another dizzy goat adds that at her age, the chances of getting babies with Down’s syndrome are high. The comments are mostly disrespectful .
I have realised with great sadness that men, millennial men, have the most backward views on women and relationships. Do what you need to do but this is the truth. They have a few self-loathing female helpers.
Someone uses her good time to record and share a video of good quality, about her views on Covid-19 and the gender it is killing the most in Kenya. She did not insult anyone. She gave her opinion. Friend, you can guess what happened, she was trending and the insults surrounding her age and marital status were all over the place from young men who should be calling her aunty.
Why are young men scared that women are growing older and not married? Do you think they will decide to marry you? Is your mother still 16? Did no one explain to you that as days go by, we all grow older? Women get married, separate, divorce, remarry or not at all, and it is none of your business.
We need to learn the art of disagreeing and how to give an opinion.
My mother (RIP) used to say no one just does a bad thing. You cannot say, “oh I was drunk or I ‘just’ made a mistake.” These are things that have been on your mind. You talk about them, you tweet about them then you act on them.
You cannot convince me you are a good man when the first thing that comes out of your mouth when a woman, that you do not know, says something, is uncalled for abusive words. Really heavy ugly insults. I shudder to think of what is in your hearts and what you actually do to people or will do.
We need to create good karma. You can disagree with someone without shaming or bullying them online, and, if really you believe in what you are saying, put your picture and real name, then give an opinion. Why are you hiding behind a pseudonym? Are you scared?
The youth have been saying that they need a chance to lead, but from the little we have seen, from the few youth leaders and the presence of most online, we are not here for the recklessness you want to rain on us. Maybe we should wait for generation Z.