Gone are the days when Valentine’s was just about men giving
gifts. Today, many Kenyan men are flipping the script; some hope to be pampered,
others reject the commercialisation of the day, however, many see love as a daily
celebration.
I spoke to some men today on the subject, and their views varied.
Many felt the day has become overly commercialised, adding unnecessary pressure to relationships.
For some, Valentine’s is about fairness.
“I hope to be gifted because I’ve been gifting people for a long time. But there’s too much pressure on this one day. If you have people you care about, showing love should be a daily expression,” said one man.
“Every day is Valentine’s for me. It’s not just about romance; it could be for friends, family, or yourself. Love should be expressed all year long," said another man.
In my interactions today, I also came to learn that a few men approach Valentine’s with zero expectations.
“I’m a staunch African, and this isn’t part of our culture. I wouldn’t wear red or carry flowers. If someone gave me flowers, I’d hand them to another lady. But I’m open for food or chocolate.”
One gentleman wondered why a man would expect to get a gift on this day.
“Why would one have expectations? Are men supposed to be given flowers? Isn’t it men who should be giving?” said another respondent.
He firmly believes that the tradition of gifting should stay as it’s always been: men giving to women
On the other hand, younger men expressed evolving attitudes, pushing back on this narrative.
“Valentine’s isn’t just for women; it’s for men too. Love is a two-way street,” one said. He emphasized the need for reciprocity, especially in modern relationships. “If I’m expected to give, I expect to be appreciated too.”
“Dynamics have changed in 2025; men are the prize now! If I don’t get anything, we move.”
For many, the holiday remains about appreciation and gratitude. “It’s a day to show your appreciation for the people who’ve been there for you. But the expensive gifts that men might want are not always realistic.”
Whether they’re looking forward to being spoiled or are indifferent to the day, men are expressing their own unique perspectives on Valentine’s.
